Guest writer: Meghan Montgomery

I am a mother of four and have been married for 15 and a half years. My husband and I still date once a month and never leave home. The best part is no need for a babysitter. Don’t get me wrong, going out to a restaurant and going to do something else with my partner is still an awesome idea, and I still love those moments when they do happen. But our at-home dates have become one of the best highlights of each month.

Here’s a story of how it came about. Then, I will get more into the dates themselves. One Christmas, my husband and I were barely making Christmas happen for our kids. People chipped in and helped out so the kids wouldn’t be remotely unhappy come Christmas morning. Usually, every Christmas, my husband and I always find the money to get each other something. That year, 2019, that wasn’t going to happen. We couldn’t find the money. So, I turned to a mom group right on Facebook. I asked for ideas on a gift to give him with zero money, some suggested just a simple blow job or a nice dinner. Then, one woman came up with the idea…Make 12 dates, one for each month of the year, and do different themes, no month being the same. That was it! I went ahead and got to work. Did you know Pinterest has a bunch of stay-at-home date night ideas? Because I quickly found that out. So, it didn’t take me long to make 12 date night ideas and have two remaining ideas. Little did we know what 2020 would bring us and the need to stay home.

What an adventure 2020 brought us. He has an idea each month, and it’s up to my husband how to execute it. He has a type A personality, so the idea might not have been his, but the way they came out was all him. For example, one idea we have done several times is dinner outside in the backyard. I would have been happy with whatever I made the kids that night, but time with him and no kids was all I ever asked for. My husband put down a blanket (because we have no patio furniture) and a bunch of pillows ordered from one of our favorite restaurants and had a nice bottle of wine. He set up candlelight and even played some music you would hear at a fancy restaurant. We sat there, had dinner and drank and even had dessert (a rare treat in our house), and enjoyed the time together.
After a year was up, we were pretty sad that it was done and over with. We didn’t want our dates to end. So, from then on, I give my husband the stack of envelopes with new and sometimes old ideas for date night every Christmas. Oh, and don’t think the kids didn’t come and bug us because they have. But usually, when we put our kids to bed, they stay. But every so often, they do get up. But after finding out what is wrong, we put them back to bed. The date is not ruined.

All of our date ideas have included dinner and dessert, but that doesn’t mean yours has to. Make them your own and have fun. This is your and your partner’s time together. Remember to pick things you and your partner like. Learn how to do new things. Even if you like something and your partner doesn’t, remember to reverse it. Here are a few dates my husband and I have done and repeated.

• Candlelight dinner
• Paint and sip
• Make dinner together
• Make our pizza together. Something that the kids wouldn’t eat.
• Nerf gun war this is so much fun. Just be prepared to run around. We joke and say it’s good marriage therapy.
• Game night. Any game, extra when you both are competitive, so the smack-talking is much more fun
• Breakfast in bed
• Dinner and movie with a theme. So, for example, if you watch Lady and the Tramp, a bowl of spaghetti and meatballs for dinner.
• Date night roulette. Kids helped Dad with these ideas. He came up what food we make our order. What the activity was, and what kind of dessert. Since I picked order out and a game night, I also picked where we got our food from and what game we played. In this game night, I ended up with video games.

I could make a list of every date night we’ve done in the last serval years but has come about but lots to list and we’ve done lots of repeats from year to year. We look forward to each month with a new idea and what kind of fun can we have together. Now, don’t think every date is going to be fun. We’ve had ones where we just didn’t enjoy as much, but we took it as we don’t like that idea, and it’s never repeated. Or sometimes it’s just improved upon.

The point of the date ideas is the time spent together and just talked and not involve the kids. My best advice if you want to do this yourself, get creative. If you have no ideas, go to mom groups; others have some amazing ideas. Also searching on the internet. It does take a little work on your end, but it is worth it in the end.

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Meghan has been married for 15 years, she is a mom of four (Autism mom of 2 and a twin mom)! You can find her on Instagram.